Like Mulder in the X-Files I want to believe. I want to believe there is a Parrot Resistant Window Treatment option. I'm forced to be believe on one level because I am the eternal optimist and I am the first to make excuses for our parrot's behaviors. So there must be a way out of all this window blind problem.
And so we grumbled and cursed at our 194 square feet of horizontal blinds on the first floor. We grumbled because the strings were magnets, who knew? Unbeknownst to us they were dazzling and inviting strings of joy to cockatiels. The horizontal slats were hidden landing strips for all! Who knew!?! The valance was a perfect place for a big red, yellow and blue macaw to hang upside down from; should our attentions not be directed correctly.
Yes we grumbled and cursed. I cursed when it was time to clean the landing strip slats. Covered in dust and dander, at one time they were smooth and easy to wipe down. Then Snickers showed every parrot in the house that the real intent was to chew on the sides to turn them all into serrated edge landing strips! Wiping with any cloth, towel, dusting device or paper towel became impossible. Besides, the strings were so compromised who knew if the whole thing wouldn't come crashing to the ground while dusting. I couldn't take any chances. So I just cursed under my breath.
Five years we've lived with these taunting and inappropriate window dressings. Inappropriate for parrots, totally okay for humans with no parrots. Obviously we do not qualify. And so we took an inventory of all the uses the birds had found for all the parts of these treatments. It seemed simple enough. Buy treatments that do not offer the following:
ANY horizontal surface of any depth as to offer a confident thought to landing on same.
Google and I spent weeks together combing ideas. We couldn't afford new windows with the internal shades. We couldn't use any treatment that offered views into our home. We couldn't entertain any horizontal anything really. Just the element of cleanliness alone was wearing down my last nerve, forget the flock and their games. I hate horizontal blinds because they are dust collecting mechanical nightmares.
I found the answer at our daughter's house. Simple. Clean. Easy. Roller blinds. Her home has them hung in such a minimalist manner, that I was totally smitten.
We purchased chocolate brown fabric light filtering roller blades. The very description rolled off my tongue with satisfaction. One for the dining/kitchen area, and two for the office/entry area. We needed just enough light but provide complete privacy with a simple tug. We've had them for a few weeks now. They work. Period.
The first two weeks Snickers was terrified of the large mass of fabric. He fought us just going through the room to get to the stairs to go to bed. He hated going to bed and getting up to come down. Snickers was not impressed. Kirby helped put them up. So to him, it's just another day in his perfect little world. Butters only ever wanted the ladder while we put them up, and to this day has not registered the roller blinds as influence to her. But she'd like to know where the ladder went. After all, it belongs to her.
These three particular locations took hundreds of hits, and chews and bites. They were the worst of our collection. They were worse than those in the bird room. Because these were the blinds Kirby, Snickers and Butters used to get out attention. That being said, Snickers has just very recently accepted them as nothing to fear and has gone back to all his normal ways. They are irrelevant. I was waiting for this turn to complete our observational experiment. Will Snicker-Doodle-Destroyer find a way to utilize these for any reason?
The answer is no. No on all fronts from all birds. No one is bothering, investigating, attempting landing on the roller or any other such parrot shenanigans. I proclaim these 100% successful in filling our needs and solving our problems. I am thoroughly happy and satisfied. They are clean looking, privacy assuring and gather neither dust or parrot to them. We will be ordering five other rollers for the bird room very soon.